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September 29, 2002
Blimpy McBlimp
Hello. I'm still sick.
I know many of you wish to.. live a day in the life of Patreesha.
Well, today's your dream come true. Here's what I did today.
1. Wake up. Go online. Play computer games.
2. Eat sandwich and soup at 11. Eat exactly 3 Kudos bars: one peanut butter, one Snickers, one chocolate chip.
3. Go back to sleep.
4. Wake up. Go online. Talk to people. Eat 2 Kudos bars in the meantime, chocolate chip and peanut butter.
5. Go back to sleep.
6. Wake up. Consume 1 Kudos: M&M's, because of guilt of leaving it out in steps 2 and 4. Go back to sleep.
7. Eat dinner. Eat 2 Kudos bars for desert.
8. Go back to sleep.
9. Go online. Download songs. Change AIM profile. Waste more time.
10. Eat 3 more Kudos bars in the meantime.
11. Well, here I am. At step 11. After consuming 11 Kudos bars, coincidentally.
Sugar-induced delirium slowly taking... over....
Note to self: do not buy economy sized variety boxes of Kudos bars.
Tomorrow, this is what I'm going to look like:
That's right. A fucking BLIMP.
::shakes fist angrily at Kudos::
...
::eats Kudos bar::
Also, I may have found a new server.
Possible new url: http://patreesha.chokesondick.com
Time to go back to sleep..
I lied, I'm not really that sick.
I'm just really lazy and love Kudos.
:(
September 23, 2002
Ew. Oh My God Ew.
I remember watching Oprah or some talk show way back in the day before daytime television was considered trash, and there were these people with all these people with these awful piercings and body mods and stuff.
Like a guy with screw-in spikes implanted in the top of his scalp.
Another guy with spikes implanted in the back of his neck.
Those weren't so bad as what I saw today.
I did an innocent Google Image Search for "nipple," and good god.
GOOD GOD.
About 3/4 of the way down the screen, I was greeted with the image of a boob with the nipple cut off, and blood flowing down in streams.
Intrigued by this, I clicked on the link.
THE HORROR!!!!!!!
Oh my dear lord.
Just to warn you before you click that link, there's pictures of amputated toes, someone cutting off his hand or something...
I think I'm going to cry.
Here's the link again.
Just because I don't want to suffer by myself. :D
THE HORROR!!!!!!!
Stupid google. Stupid, stupid google.
In other news, my AWESOME friend Jared made me a SWEET ASS Weezer rarities-mix-compilation-bsides-demo-octopus-cd (okay, I made the octopus part up), and it is AWESOME.
Awesome.
<3!!!!
In case you've finally decided to stop being a chicken, here's that disgusting site again.
THE HORROR!!!!!!!
:D
September 22, 2002
Goodbye, Cruel World
I am really sick.
So so sick.
What happened?
Well, here are the culprits.
PERSIAN CAT OF DOOM!!:
I work with Paul.
Paul has a persian cat.
I am deathly allergic to cats.
Therefore, I am deathly allergic to Paul.
This could be why I am dying.
Next subject:
PUMPERNICKEL BAGEL OF DOOM!!:
I had one for the first time last night.
It was disgusting.
What the hell is "pumpernickel" anyway?
Whatever it is, it could be why I'm sick.
And finally,
JON OF DOOM!!!:
This is Jon.
He's building a sandcastle.
He was sick last week.
Now I am sick.
That contagious bastard.
I think I have the plague.
(:D Hi Jon.)
On a happier note, Anthony surprised me last night on the ride home from work with a present!
It was the sountrack to "About a Boy," by "Badly Drawn Boy"..
Awww.. <3<3<3
I've been listening to it over and over as I lie here in bed, hating all of the healthy people in the world and plotting their demise.
September 18, 2002
YLERO BLARNG!!!@
MODEST MOUSE SHIRTS!!!!
Holy freeeeeeking shit.
[x] I'm feeling the light blue star one.
[x] Maybe the El Diablo one?
This is where you guys come in.
Which one should I get? :O
September 16, 2002
Emails from Heaven
Actually, not from heaven, but from Yazzymobile:
From : Yasmeen
To : spinkies55@hotmail.com
Subject : Kenny Rogers
Date : Sun, 15 Sep 2002 23:08:48 EDT
MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com
Go here. Now.
Oh my god.
This ranks up in my list with YoureTheManNowDog.com.
The internet is a beautiful, wasteful cesspool.
Unfortunately, I missed the Andrew WK concert on Saturday because I had to WORK.
My only consolation was the fact that so many fat, short "emo" kids came in with their little pleather pyramid studded belts and "mod" haircuts.
Actually, I'm not even sure if the same 3 kids just kept going in and out of the store for a few hours, because they all look the same to me.
Oh, by the way, if I haven't mentioned this before, some douchebag sent me a virus, so my computer is slowly dying until my brother reformats it.
So, if I am gone for a rather extended period of time, it is either because:
A. I have run away to a secluded, tropical island in the Caribbean with my wealthy, handsome, beautifully tanned, south-of-the-border lover Ricardo,
or
B. My computer is temporarily incapacitated.
Probably B. though. :/
Oh man, I almost forgot...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAKEYPOO!!!!!
<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3!!!!!
Yay!!!! :D
September 8, 2002
How It All Began..
My Manager: So what do you want your nametag to say? Patricia? Patty? Trish? What do you like?
Me: Umm.. It doesn't matter to me, but I guess Trish is fine.
My Manager: Okay
...
::hands me nametag::
Me: Hey, this says Patty on it!
My Manager: Shut up, you asshat.
Yup.... Work isn't so bad though. I just have this paralyzing soreness throughout my body, that's all.
Last night I watched 16 Candles and The Breakfast Club on TV until 4:30 in the morning..
Those are such good movies, and Molly Shannon (Good god, I can't believe I typed that) Ringwald is such a babe.
I know everyone says this, but I really wish I were living in the 80's right now..
No, not because of all the gay shit everyone's always going on and on about, like Carebears and Strawberry Shortcake and all of those campy cartoons, but it just seems like such a cool era to be in..
I dunno.
So yeah, school started last week, and it's pretty awful, I guess.
I don't really have too much more to say about it.
It sucks.
Goodnight.
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